Scholars and Rogues » video http://www.scholarsandrogues.com Think - it ain't illegal yet... Wed, 10 Mar 2010 03:44:09 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 Snow job: sick nasty shreddin’ at The Times’ website? Huh? http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2010/02/10/snow-job-sick-nasty-shreddin-at-the-times-website-huh/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2010/02/10/snow-job-sick-nasty-shreddin-at-the-times-website-huh/#comments Wed, 10 Feb 2010 18:19:10 +0000 Dr. Denny http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=14768 “OMG!” I thought. There, on the website of the Gray Lady — a moniker attached to The New York Times for its past penchant for words over photographs — was a headline I never expected to see:

“Snowboard Videos: Send Us Your Tricks”

“How dare The Times stoop to such pandering to an unseemly demographic,” I harrumphed. Snowboard tricks? In The Times? How could my principal source of serious news by serious people about serious issues and events sink to pandering to the fans of fakie? This is unthinkable.

Beginning Feb. 12, The Times will open a website to host these videos. But why on earth (or snow) would The Times want snowboard videos? I mean, gee whiz, this could amount to amateur night among the heathens. The Times does things right — you know, professionally done photography, video, graphics and other illustrations. What gives with wanting videos likely to be of goofy-footers eatin’ snow?

The Times needs money. That’s what gives.

Two and a half years ago, The Times had neared what some wags termed financial collapse. According to analyst Henry Blodget, in the short term The Times owed almost a half billion dollars more than it had in assets. A few months later, The Times decided to borrow $225 million against its interest in its brand-new headquarters. Those were tough “times.”

Today The Times reported that its fourth-quarter earnings more than tripled over a year ago. That does not mean, however, that New York Times Co., which owns its namesake paper, The Boston Globe, the International Herald Tribune and 15 other daily newspapers, is making fat profits.

During that fourth quarter, The Times cut 8 percent of its newsroom staff. That, of course, saved money. Its advertising revenue saw its smallest decline — 14.7 percent — in a year, but that’s still a decline. According to the AP story: “Overall revenue fell 11.5 percent to $681 million, better than the $653 million expected by analysts.” But revenue — despite whacking personnel, a slightly improving economy and lower pension costs — continues to decline despite gains in online ad revenue. The Times continues to falter financially.

The Times over the past decade has removed so much talent from its newsroom, as have so many other American newspapers. It’s added responsibilities to those who remain — getting content on the website as well as managing content for mobile devices, for example.

These days, I read The Times mostly on my Blackberry. (And boy, does that surprise me.) But online and on mobile, each day I see evidence of erosion of the quality of The Times — editing errors, writing errors, failure to follow up on points made by sources, over-reliance on “official” sources, and so forth.

I love The Times. I have read it my entire life. Despite its increasing flaws, I still regard it as the best daily newspaper in America. But The Times no longer loves me. At 64 years old, I am no longer the demographic it desires to sell to advertisers. It you’ve seen The Times‘ television ads for its “weekender” subscription, it should be clear that the demographic The Times wants is far younger, with perhaps more disposable income, than me. (Fun link: See the parody ad.)

I keep waiting for the online edition of The Times to ask for videos of lawn bowling and shuffleboard, but I guess I’ll just have to keep dreaming.

Now, let’s go look at those shredder vids, eh, kids?

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2010/02/10/snow-job-sick-nasty-shreddin-at-the-times-website-huh/feed/ 3 TunesDay: Bohemian Rhapsody (ridiculous2sublime and back again) http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2010/01/26/tunesday-bohemian-rhapsody-ridiculous2sublime-and-back-again/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2010/01/26/tunesday-bohemian-rhapsody-ridiculous2sublime-and-back-again/#comments Tue, 26 Jan 2010 17:00:03 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=14520 Today we celebrate one of the greatest, and most improbable, moments in the history of rock.

Let’s begin with the Mnozil Brass:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Then there’s the Muppets:

Click here to view the embedded video.

And the UC Men’s Octet (2003):

Click here to view the embedded video.

This bit of silliness is for Brian.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Ummm, not sure what the hell to make of this.

Click here to view the embedded video.

The Ten Tenors:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Old School Computer Mix (this is just feckin’ brilliant):

Click here to view the embedded video.

Another a capella take, this time from FORK:

Click here to view the embedded video.

This, from Hayseed Dixie, was completely uncalled for:

Click here to view the embedded video.

And there’s more, oh so much more. But let’s close with the original:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Happy TunesDay, folks.

Thanks to bella ragazza for the inspiration.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2010/01/26/tunesday-bohemian-rhapsody-ridiculous2sublime-and-back-again/feed/ 5 Saturday Video Roundup: Gossip http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/12/12/saturday-video-roundup-gossip/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/12/12/saturday-video-roundup-gossip/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 2009 16:00:29 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=13589 Meet one of my favorite new discoveries of 2k9 – Gossip. I’m still trying to parse everything that’s going on here – seriously, they’re described as “punk,” which they certainly are, but they’re also maybe the best indie party dance band I’ve heard since The B-52s. I’d never have thought you could slam everything from The BellRays to Paula Abdul to Kate Pierson to Yaz to Duffy together and make it work. But somehow, that’s exactly what Beth Ditto and company have done.

Expect to hear more when my year-end “Best CDs of 2009″ list drops here in a couple of weeks.

From their 2009 release, Music for Men, this is “Heavy Cross.”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Keeping You Alive” features puppetry!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Let’s wrap it up Live with Dave:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Happy Saturday, y’all.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/12/12/saturday-video-roundup-gossip/feed/ 2 TunesDay: scary monsters http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/27/tunesday-scary-monsters/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/27/tunesday-scary-monsters/#comments Tue, 27 Oct 2009 19:00:23 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=12490

When we think about Halloween and art, we sort of automatically think of film. And why not. We have a decades-long library of movies designed to scare the pants off us. But there are some bands out there working the shadows with their music, as well. While it’s unfair to dismiss so many talented artists as Halloween acts – because talented and unconventional is cool 24/7/365 – it’s also true that during this week the veil between the mundane and arcane grows thin.

So, to help you prepare your playlist, here are some of our scary music favorites.

First, from Toronto, one of the absolute best darkpop bands in the world, The Birthday Massacre. This is their video for “Blue”:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Sadly, Switchblade Symphony has parted ways. Their music still haunts our dollhouses, though. This is “Clown”:

Click here to view the embedded video.

If you need a little rock & roll vampire fantasy in your life, let us recommend Seraphim Shock’s “After Dark”:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Finally, let’s close with a band that more of you might be familiar with – here’s “Sober,” from Tool:

Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/27/tunesday-scary-monsters/feed/ 1 Sunday Afternoon Random Embed Theatre presents: Metric’s ‘Empty’ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/18/sunday-afternoon-random-embed-theatre-presents-metrics-empty/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/18/sunday-afternoon-random-embed-theatre-presents-metrics-empty/#comments Sun, 18 Oct 2009 22:55:38 +0000 A. N. Cargo http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=12192 Imagine you’re cancelled puppet-driven Fox comedy series “Greg the Bunny.” You’re unemployed, naturally, and rather depressed. You show up at a bar and chat up “Sesame Street.”

The two of you get nice and sauced, stagger towards the subway and eventually make it back to Sesame’s $4.5 million penthouse, where you proceed to wildly bump unprotected uglies and find out the other’s dirty secret: That you both cry during sex.

Warning for those with heart conditions, delicate eardrums towards 2:00.

Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/18/sunday-afternoon-random-embed-theatre-presents-metrics-empty/feed/ 1 AfPakintacular http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/12/afpakintacular/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/12/afpakintacular/#comments Mon, 12 Oct 2009 12:13:28 +0000 Lex http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11964 It was such a pleasant weekend. Fall is in the air. Football is on TV, and the Angels sent the Boston Red Sox golfing. It even felt wholesome and normal to listen to the soothing sounds of Republicans and Democrats making fun of each other and playing nerf meme dodge ball. I suppose that we owe the Nobel Committee a thank you note. But all good things must come to an end. Or…. Now that we’ve got that peace prize thing out of the way, let’s get back to the business of war.

Mullah Omar is back with a vengeance, says a story on the front page of The NY Times that’s been echoed in red atop the Huffington Post. The latter patriotically reminds you to let the authorities know if you see a tall, male Afghan with black hair and a shrapnel wound to his right eye.

“This is an amazing story,” said Bruce Riedel, a former Central Intelligence Agency officer who coordinated the Obama administration’s initial review of Afghanistan policy in the spring. “He’s a semiliterate individual who has met with no more than a handful of non-Muslims in his entire life. And he’s staged one of the most remarkable military comebacks in modern history.”

Whether or not Omar is the real brains behind the Taliban resurgence that has D.C. policy makers sweating remains to be determined, but it’s a gripping story that produces a nicely defined villain. It fits well with Secretary Clinton’s recent pronouncements concerning the attack-hostage situation-siege in Pakistan, reminding us “that extremists … are increasingly threatening the authority of the [Pakistani] state….” She also pointed out there is only “strong and clear” resolve in the fight against the Taliban; a fight that the US will work with the new Afghan government to win.

That would be the Afghan government that recently won an election we haven’t seen in many headlines. Thanks to Peter Galbraith, the UN was forced to announce that the election was marred by “widespread fraud“. And she forgot to mention the rumors of the Obama administration entertaining the possibility of allowing the Taliban a stake in governing Afghanistan. That would be unnamed official speak for “pretty much right back where we started from…minus a few hundred billion and stacks of dead bodies.”

There’s a lot to be considered when the mandarins spend this week beneath the Nobel sheen, deciding what to do next. General McChrystal will be arguing for at least 40,000 more boots on the ground. He needs them because “the overall situation is deteriorating” and “the insurgents currently have the initiative.” The doves (stop snickering), like my own Sen. Carl Levin, say that there are other ways to show our resolve.

More hawkish politicians point out that just training Afghans won’t cut it. We need to destroy the Taliban if we can ever hope to defeat Al Qaeda, and if we fail in Afghanistan then Pakistan will surely fall to the sort of extremists that keep Sec. Clinton awake at night. And imagine if the Taliban give Al Qaeda sanctuary again; that would be a grave threat to our national security.

We could consider Mullah Omar’s statement in September: “We assure all countries that the Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan, as a responsible force, will not extend its hand to cause jeopardy to others.” Mr. Riedel, the CIA officer quoted above, assures us that any such statement from Omar is just “clever propaganda.” Being one of the designers of the current Afghan strategy and a Langley fellow, he’d probably know.

And the Grey Lady would never lie to us *cough* Iraq *cough* Georgian War *cough*…excuse me, i seem to be having a coughing fit that might go on for some time.

Ahem. If you feel like you might be getting the run around South Asia, you’ll want to read Eric Margolis in The Toronto Sun:

Truth is war’s first casualty. The Afghan war’s biggest untruth is, “we’ve got to fight terrorists over there so we don’t have to fight them at home.”

Many North Americans still buy this lie because they believe the 9/11 attacks came directly from the Afghanistan-based al-Qaida and Taliban movements.

False. The 9/11 attacks were planned in Germany and Spain, and conducted mainly by U.S.-based Saudis to punish America for supporting Israel.

It’s well worth reading the whole article, because you are getting the run around. Margolis may not have it 100% correct, but he has less to gain by speaking the truth than men like Riedel and Levin have to lose from it.

We’re sinking in a pointless quagmire, begun on lies that our peace prize winner chooses to perpetuate. Do you really think that Obama will put a stop to it? Can you define victory in South Asia? The only question that remains is whether we’ll make it longer than the Soviets, since it’s pretty clear that the end will be the same.

Thanks to Ian Welsh for pointing out the Margolis piece.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/12/afpakintacular/feed/ 3 Rock and roll doesn’t respect borders http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/11/rock-and-roll-doesnt-respect-borders/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/11/rock-and-roll-doesnt-respect-borders/#comments Sun, 11 Oct 2009 17:11:16 +0000 Lex http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11956 One day my Austrian roommate came home and told me that one of the biggest bands in Russian rock history would be playing a show in Piter. How could i say no? So i went to the Cultural Palace with a group of Austrian students, a nation not known for its dedication to rock. The lobby was filled with Russians of every age and clique. Middleagers. Teens. Hippies. Metalheads. Punks. New Russians. Everyone. We found our seats near the back of the auditorium, but it was clear that the Russians–as is their way–were going to pay no attention to any rule stamped on a piece of paper. The chair free section in front of the stage was filling up fast, and i wanted to be up there. Once the band played their first chord i turned to my companions and said, “Stay here if you want, but i won’t.” I pushed down into the crowd with my companions following and had one of the best times of my life.

Keep in mind that the whole history of rock basically exploded in Russia during the 1980’s. I own a copy of Melodia’s release of the Rolling Stone’s greatest hits “19 Nervous Songs” that’s dated 1990. Of course, Western music was slipped into the country and passed from hand-to-hand in the traditional method of popular subversion before being allowed. But to a great extent Russians got The Beatles, Elvis and The Stones at the same time they got Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath and Metallica. It makes Russian rock, which tends to retain Russian folk influences, pretty interesting.

The band i saw that night can probably be described as “The Russian Beatles”. Chaif is still growing strong. The name is a contraction of the Russian word for “tea” and the Russian transliteration of “jive”; the story goes that they would play while getting rather high on strong tea brewed in a coffee maker. A lot of the catalog is rather melancholic…they are Russians after all. And with that i’ll stop talking and let you listen to two of Russia’s rock greats.

“Nye Dai Mnye Povod”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Nikto Nye Uslishit” (Oy-Yo)

Click here to view the embedded video.

“C Voini”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Rock’N'Roll Etoi Nochi”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Davai Vernyomsya” (my personal favorite)

Click here to view the embedded video.

And now onto DDT, the other giant of Russian Rock…

“Belaya Reka”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Osen”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Prosvisela”

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Eta Vsyo” (possibly the saddest song in history, and while i’m not much for orchestral arrangements, good videos of this are hard to come by)

Click here to view the embedded video.

Oy, kak eto builo davno…

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/11/rock-and-roll-doesnt-respect-borders/feed/ 5 Street smarts: the American revolution http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/07/street-smarts-the-american-revolution/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/07/street-smarts-the-american-revolution/#comments Wed, 07 Oct 2009 12:24:12 +0000 Lex http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11876 Grover helps Thomas Jefferson meet a deadline:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Grover and George Washington plan a surprise:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Choosing a national bird:

Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/07/street-smarts-the-american-revolution/feed/ 2 Street smarts: Hope http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/02/street-smarts-hope/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/02/street-smarts-hope/#comments Fri, 02 Oct 2009 12:55:28 +0000 Lex http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11785 Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/10/02/street-smarts-hope/feed/ 1 Street smarts: Cookie Monster shares http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/30/street-smarts-cookie-monster-shares/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/30/street-smarts-cookie-monster-shares/#comments Wed, 30 Sep 2009 12:04:56 +0000 Lex http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11741 Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/30/street-smarts-cookie-monster-shares/feed/ 2 Street smarts: What makes people angry? http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/28/street-smarts-what-makes-people-angry/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/28/street-smarts-what-makes-people-angry/#comments Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:02:34 +0000 Lex http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11711 Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/28/street-smarts-what-makes-people-angry/feed/ 2 TunesDay: Du Hast http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/01/tunesday-du-hast/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/01/tunesday-du-hast/#comments Tue, 01 Sep 2009 22:30:35 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=11150 Question: Which of the following doesn’t belong with the rest?

a: kittens
b: bunnies
c: rainbows
d: unicorns flying out of your ass
e: Rammstein

Answer:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Thx to Ubertramp for passing this along.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/09/01/tunesday-du-hast/feed/ 10 Saturday Video Roundup: “War/No More Trouble” http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/08/15/saturday-video-roundup-warno-more-trouble/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/08/15/saturday-video-roundup-warno-more-trouble/#comments Sat, 15 Aug 2009 12:00:37 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=10818 More awesomeness from Playing for Change. Happy Saturday.

Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/08/15/saturday-video-roundup-warno-more-trouble/feed/ 11 Saturday Video Roundup: new Jeffrey Dean Foster video http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/05/16/saturday-video-roundup-new-jeffrey-dean-foster-video/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/05/16/saturday-video-roundup-new-jeffrey-dean-foster-video/#comments Sat, 16 May 2009 13:26:37 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=9174 Our friend Jeffrey Dean Foster has a new video for “Corner of My Eye,” and we thought we’d share. It takes a distinctly indie approach, but in doing so conjures a lot of the actual warmth that attends Jeff’s music and live shows. Very nice.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Happy Saturday…

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/05/16/saturday-video-roundup-new-jeffrey-dean-foster-video/feed/ 1 Saturday Video Roundup: Lee Camp and the Ghost of Unbridled Capitalism Past http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/05/09/saturday-video-roundup-lee-camp-and-the-ghost-of-unbridled-capitalism-past/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/05/09/saturday-video-roundup-lee-camp-and-the-ghost-of-unbridled-capitalism-past/#comments Sat, 09 May 2009 14:39:07 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=9078 Our friend Lee Camp is at it again:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Of course, with this one I find myself laughing less than usual…

While we’re here, how about a little bonus Lee on Susan Boyle and the unlikelihood of stardom.

Click here to view the embedded video.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/05/09/saturday-video-roundup-lee-camp-and-the-ghost-of-unbridled-capitalism-past/feed/ 0 Aerosmith: a remembrance from my teenage years http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/04/03/aerosmith-remembrance/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/04/03/aerosmith-remembrance/#comments Sat, 04 Apr 2009 04:54:41 +0000 Brian Angliss http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=8413 One of my favorite bands is Aerosmith, but in the early 1980s I didn’t know it. I was happily listening to songs like “Walk This Way” and “Dream On” and “Back in the Saddle” long before I knew that it was Aerosmith. My sister was doing everything she could to broaden my mind to include music that wasn’t Pet Shop Boys, Madonna, Toto, or Gloria Estefan, and Aerosmith was one of the bands I half listened to as we were washing dishes after dinner every night. But I didn’t hit my stride into hard rock and metal until after a certain video came out on MTV: the 1986 Run DMC cover of “Walk This Way.”

It wasn’t until then that I realized just how much I liked the song, that it was Aerosmith who was singing it, and that I did not, in fact, actually like the Run DMC cover all that much.

But at the tender age of 13, that video whisked me off to Oz and paved my yellow brick road with albums ranging from Def Leppard to Pearl Jam, from Midnight Oil to Suzanne Vega, from Jethro Tull to Depeche Mode.

And partly because of Run DMC’s cover, Aerosmith’s career has been long and varied and fun, if not necessarily sublime.

That said, however, Aerosmith has done at least one truly sublime song and performance. The first time I watched the video on MTV, it pinned me to my chair. I remember, when it was over, not feeling like I’d even taken a breath through the whole thing. Even now it still pins me to my chair when I hear it. Enjoy.

As an aside, Run DMC is being inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame tomorrow. I don’t know or really care whether a rap group really belongs in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, but if they hadn’t been featured on NPR this morning I probably wouldn’t have remembered this.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2009/04/03/aerosmith-remembrance/feed/ 0 Serious holiday fun http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/12/19/serious-holiday-fun/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/12/19/serious-holiday-fun/#comments Fri, 19 Dec 2008 13:18:16 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=6137 Want to see a dog enjoying the snow? Pay attention – at the 1:20 mark it nearly turns into a Bugs Bunny cartoon.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Hope you’re having this much fun today.

Thanks to Marti Smith for passing this one along….

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/12/19/serious-holiday-fun/feed/ 3 Saturday Video Roundup: Got Milk? http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/12/13/saturday-video-roundup-got-milk/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/12/13/saturday-video-roundup-got-milk/#comments Sat, 13 Dec 2008 21:56:25 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=5987 I’m sure you’ll have questions. But first, just indulge yourself in the magic of milk-rock legends White Gold.

Click here to view the embedded video.

And wow, is it just me or is your hair really shiny? How do you do that?

Click here to view the embedded video.

This is great, but how do I tame the white tiger?

Click here to view the embedded video.

Okay, we promised you answers. Here you go.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Yes, at S&R our tolerance extends to lactose.

Got Comments?

Thanks to Dr. Mike Pecaut, who apparently spends hours each work day surfing for … whatever this is.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/12/13/saturday-video-roundup-got-milk/feed/ 9 S&R EXTRA!!! Elizabeth Dole possessed by Jesse Helms!!! http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/10/29/sr-extra-elizabeth-dole-possessed-by-jesse-helms/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/10/29/sr-extra-elizabeth-dole-possessed-by-jesse-helms/#comments Wed, 29 Oct 2008 22:39:38 +0000 JS OBrien http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=5081 Elizabeth Dole, wife of former Senator and presidential candidate Robert Dole, and Republican Senator from North Carolina (or “Nawth Ca’lina” if you prefer the proper pronunciation), was possessed today by Jesse Helms’ twisted, gangrenous, suppurating soul.  Channeling Helms’ mavericky energy, Dole released an ad accusing her opponent in this year’s senatorial campaign, Kay Hagan, in what has to be the most … well … just watch it.  It’s only 30 seconds.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Dole, Jesse Helms’ protege and hand-picked successor for his North Carolina Senatorial seat, is facing a very difficult election most pundits think she will lose.  Summoning Helms from his benighted corner of Hell, where he was being repeatedly sodomized for eternity by 72 virgin African American men, Dole obtained the formula for Helms’ come-from-behind victory over African American candidate Harvey Gantt, in the ad shown here.

Click here to view the embedded video.

It remains to be seen if the dark magic Helms used to win against Gantt will work against Hagan; if North Carolina has grown up sufficiently to be immune to this sort of sorcery.  Clearly, Dole doesn’t believe that it has.

Nor does Helms, it would appear.

]]> http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/10/29/sr-extra-elizabeth-dole-possessed-by-jesse-helms/feed/ 1 America’s Negro Cracker Problem: none of us are free http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/10/21/americas-cracker-problem-none-of-us-are-free/ http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/2008/10/21/americas-cracker-problem-none-of-us-are-free/#comments Tue, 21 Oct 2008 12:00:00 +0000 Dr. Slammy http://www.scholarsandrogues.com/?p=4762 Part two in a series.

There’s a rising tide on the rivers of blood
But if the answer isn’t violence, neither is your silence

- Pop Will Eat Itself, “Ich Bin Ein Auslander”

When all is said and done, nothing communicates the racism and knee-buckling stupidity of all-too-wide swaths of our nation quite like video. So if you don’t trust me to tell the truth about these folks, maybe you’ll trust their own words.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Here, for your copying-and-pasting convenience, is a transcription of some of what you just heard:

“I’m afraid if he wins, the blacks will take over. He’s not a Christian! This is a Christian nation! What is our country gonna end up like?”

“When you got a Nigger running for president, you need a first stringer. He’s definitely a second stringer.”

“He seems like a sheep – or a wolf in sheep’s clothing to be honest with you. And I believe Palin – she’s filled with the Holy Spirit, and I believe she’s gonna bring honesty and integrity to the White House.”

“He’s related to a known terrorist, for one.”

“He is friends with a terrorist of this country!”

“He must support terrorists! You know, uh, if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck. And that to me is Obama.”

“Just the whole, Muslim thing, and everything, and everybody’s still kinda – a lot of people have forgotten about 9/11, but… I dunno, it’s just kinda… a little unnerving.”

“Obama and his wife, I’m concerned that they could be anti-white. That he might hide that.”

“I don’t like the fact that he thinks us white people are trash… because we’re not!”

As I always told my writing students: show, don’t tell.

Clearing a Low Bar

Welcome to a state where the politics of hate
Shout loud in the crowd “Watch
them beat us all down.”

At this point, I’m trying to imagine what I can add that isn’t superfluous. That racism still exists, in tragic amounts, isn’t a revelation to anyone with more than six or seven functioning brain cells, although being confronted anew with this kind of evidence is still jarring.

What’s different, though, is what I said back in June.

Make no mistake, in the coming months you’re going to see the ugliest artillery that our nation’s drooling, inbred hatemongers have at their disposal. The looming prospect of a nigra in the White House is going to bring the vermin out of the woodwork, out from under their rocks and out into the light. It’s going to incite the well-heeled country club elite to crank up the meme machine with every sort of subtle, codemongering dogwhistle it can manufacture. The truly ignorant and hateful are going to be liquored up on rhetorical bile of the lowest sort and those who live further up the social ladder are going to be provided with a variety of messages that let them vote white without having to admit to themselves that they’re fundamentally just like the snuff-suckers in the trailer park across the tracks.

This is a good thing. Let me say that again: this is a good thing.

It’s a good thing because we’ll never defeat an enemy that can safely hide from scrutiny. This is a disease that’s only going to be cured with copious amounts of very bright light.

We will not fear your mask. Because what we believe in doesn’t need to hide.

In this election campaign, let’s invite the Klan and its fellow hate groups out into the light. Let’s get their hoods off of them. Let’s show all their videos. Let’s make sure that everybody gets to read their brochures and visit their Web sites. Let’s hand the microphone to their most eloquent speakers and stand aside. Let’s get them front and center and make sure America sees, in all its slack-jawed, toothless glory, precisely what racism looks like.
…
And above all, when we hear racist code masquerading as legitimate, issues-based messaging, let’s not be afraid to say “excuse me, but will you take off your hood?”

It’s decision time, and I’m ready for a referendum on hate. How about you?

Regardless of what happens on Election Day, we won’t have triumphed finally and completely over ignorance. Our culture is, at its very core, anti-intellectual and frighteningly tolerant of the willfully stupid. We fetishize shallowness and vote on whether or not we’d like to have a beer with the candidate. We mock “elites,” sort of. We’re too thick to recognize real elitism when we see it, but we can be relentless in our abuse of those born to meager means who, through little but their own intelligence and hard work, rise up to make something of themselves. Our ability for self-deception is unmatched in the entire civilized world.

But an Obama victory (which looks more likely by the day) would nonetheless mark a milestone: we would have arrived at a point where a man of non-white (or half non-white, as the case may be) heritage can be elected to our highest office. As my colleague Whythawk has observed, that actually says something pretty good about America, given how few of our fellow industrialized nations can say the same.

“We suck less,” though, isn’t the sort of shining-city-on-the-hill standard America has traditionally prided itself on setting (even if only rhetorically), and while being the first to clear a very low bar is something to note, it’s not something to get too puffed up over. This is especially true when we have millions of citizens howling for the corpse of Barack Obama. It’s especially true when our media institutions ignore the filthiness happening right before their eyes. It’s especially true when these disgusting public spectacles are funded by a hyper-rich power elite that’s willing to spend whatever it takes to keep us ignorant and at each other’s throats.

As for the premise that McCain is no racist, well … racist is as racist does, don’t you think? He got his back up at the suggestion that he was somehow like George Wallace, but in what conceivable way is that charge less fair and valid than the slanders his campaign has slung in Obama’s direction?

And why should we taken seriously McCain’s late-to-the-dance attempts to rein in the hate that’s been committed in his name? His actions in recent years have made clear that he’s willing to do whatever it takes to win the White House, Bob Dolizing himself to a degree that Dole himself could hardly have imagined. Tack this way on the advice of advisers, pander to the Right to shore up the base, let Karl Rove bully you out of your VP preference, let slip the dogs of Race War… Why would I or you or any other thinking American regard this as anything besides a tactical maneuver driven by research showing that undecided voters are turned off by it?

None of Us Are Free

In “None of Us Are Free” (written by Barry Mann, Brenda Russell and Cynthia Weil), Solomon Burke sings

None of us are free.
None of us are free.
None of us are free, one of us is chained.
None of us are free.

Clearly, large portions of America remain chained. Our Cracker Problem persists, and what ought to be most disconcerting is that it not only exists in the heart of Georgia, in Outback Ohio, in pro-America Virginia or in a Republican Women’s club in California. It not only thrives in the minds of elderly whites who preferred Jim Crow to Martin Luther King. It’s not only alive and well in organizations like Stormfront and the League of the South.

No, the problem is that racism, racemongering and race-baiting are alive and well at the very highest, most public levels of our democracy: our presidential election process. And it was put there, on full display, and sanctioned by one of the only two parties that ever really stands a chance in any national election.

On November 4th, let’s hope for an epic thrashing of those who seek to profit by trading in hate and ignorance. Let’s further hope that those who can’t and won’t evolve get the message loud and clear: crawl back underneath your rocks and remain quiet until it’s finally your time to die.

But whatever we do, let’s not confuse winning a battle with winning the war. Our Cracker Problem will be with us for awhile longer, and November 5th will be the beginning, not the end.

And when they come to ethnically cleanse me
Will you speak out? Will you defend me?
Or laugh through a glass
eye as they rape our lives
Trampled underfoot by the Right on the rise…

Click here to view the embedded video.

Previously: Ich Bin Ein Auslander

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